More than half a day had gone by and still Miss Parker had done nothing but stayed affixed on her living room sofa. She laid curled up as a ball waiting for life to pass her by. One week was such a long time to have been away from the bundle of joy she now called her own. She'd never been away from him before. It was slowly killing her softly on the affect Burke had on her. Thoughts of that dreadful day, repeatedly played in her head. Jarod had blamed her for everything. All she's ever been was a loving mother to his son and to have treated her so cruelly, certainly felt like he had ripped her heart apart. Instead of sadness and heartbreak, she had begun to feel resentful towards him.

Parker headed to the bathroom, stood under the hot sprays of water as if it would suddenly wash away the twisted knots in her tensed body. She was a happy child, up until her mother's death. Unhappiness followed her all through her growing years, feeling like an unwanted child. Jarod and Burke were the family she'd ever wanted that had filled her void in life.

Something had to be done about situations which surrounded her problems with Jarod. She readied herself for a fight of her life. She was dressed in blue jeans, a red tee shirt and walking shoes, instead of her usual skin tight leather outfits and three inch stiletto heels. Her face was flawless. There were no traces of makeup on her skin. Her hair had been pulled back into a ponytail. Miss Parker grabbed her handbag and fumbled for her car keys. As she opened her front door, startled, she let out a scream. Burke giggled, jumped up and down in his daddy's arms and stretched his little hands at the sight of her.

"What are you doing here?" She spoke in a high pitched voice unlike her very own. Immediately, she scooped him away from Jarod and embraced him tightly. "I was just coming to see you, sweetie!"

"I guess we both had the same idea," Jarod replied stuffing his hands in the pockets of his pants.

Parker completely ignored him and focused her attention on the baby. "Look at you! Just look at you! You're a big boy now! Your little cap fits you perfectly! Did daddy finally decide to let you out of the house? Are you eating well? Yes, you are! Look how fat you've gotten!" She softly pinched his cheek and walked into the living room leaving Jarod to stand alone. He held in his temper and closed the door.

"I'm glad you're here. I was just about to go and kidnap you!" She let out a laugh to the baby.

"Okay, cut the crap, Parker. I'm standing right here. It's not like he drove himself here. The least you could do is acknowledge me."

She felt like screaming at him, but, instead, cuddled the baby and spoke softly in her throaty voice as so not to frighten him in her usual "ice queen" manner.

"All these years, Jarod, you've always been there for me, even if I hadn't wanted you to. And when we finally got together, I didn't think I'd be able to live without you. But, these several days, things changed. I've changed. I really don't want to hold on to you forever. You're free to go. I'm letting you go. I just don't want to be away from the baby. I'm the only mother he knows and I want to set up arrangements with you for visitation rights. I can't be without him. Don't severe my relationship with Burke, just because things didn't work out for us. Give mommy a kiss." She puckered her lips at the baby as he cupped his hands on her face and gave Parker a wet smooch.

"Parker, I..." Jarod bit his lower lip lightly. "I apologize for treating you the way I did. I was angry. I..."

She interrupted abruptly. "You were cruel, okay! Heartless! Lyle had a gun to my head! And I..." She raised her voice.

"I know." The "pretender" fidgeted.

Her voice softened for the baby's sake. "I couldn't do a thing. I had no control of what "The Centre" was going to do. I didn't know. It's not like I was in on their plans. I know what I promised Rachel. I promised to take care of her son. Not my son. Her son. Heaven knows how many times you've thrown that in my face. And you wanted a trade off? You told "daddy" me for the baby. At that point, I knew you didn't want me in your life. Well, surprise. Neither do I. But, I want this little guy. Oh, and furthermore! You could have killed us on the road that day! What the hell were you thinking? Maybe you want to join Rachel now! But, I bloody don't! Someone has to be here to take care of Burke! "

"You're right. There's no excuse for my behavior. I didn't...I wasn't thinking. I thought I was the only one hurting, I didn't take into consideration on your feelings..."

"Yes! You didn't take into consideration that I had any feelings at all! When they took Burke, my whole world collapsed!"

"How do I unblock the pain I've caused you? Burke's not the only one who missed you, you know." His voice softened to a whisper.

"I hate to love you. My heart only has so much room for love. And right now, I have no room for you, Jarod."

"I love you. I never stopped."

Miss Parker turned her attention to Burke. "Are you happy to see me? I'm happy to see you! Did you miss me. I missed you! And you know mommy loves you very much!" She walked as far away as possible from Jarod.

"Okay, I deserved that!" He yelled out. "You're going to make me beg for forgiveness, aren't you?"

She quicky turned and marched over to him. "No. No need to. Because I'm never forgiving you." Burke ran his hand on her face. "Yes, it's me, baby. Mommy." She delighted his touches on her as he tried to shove his tiny fingers into her mouth. Miss Parker quickly switched on and off as she spoke to Burke and then to Jarod. "Stop that, silly. Do you want me to just swallow you up? Well, I'm waiting for an answer. About visitation rights? How about if I have him every weekend?"

Jarod stood in silence. He nodded.

"Thank you, Jarod. I thought you'd never let me see him again. How long can I have him for today? Could you come back in the early evening? I want to spend as much time with him. Would you like that, baby? Spend some time with me. Make up for our lost time together?"

"Uh, well, actually, Parker, I thought maybe you'd like to join us. We were planning on a trip to the zoo." He smiled, although, it seemed he was almost afraid to. "I packed a bag for him for the day."

She almost eagerly agreed to it, but, caught herself. Thoughts of that horrible day flashed through her head. His hurtful words entered her mind. "I don't do family things," she told him coldly.

It pretty much killed any possibilities of a deeper relationship with Parker. "So, do you want to just cut whatever ties we've had with each other? "

"As long it's with you and not the baby." Her blue eyes shot up at him. "I can live without you. But, not this guy."

"It's done!" Jarod raised his voice.

She walked into her bedroom and came out with a quilt.

"Here, spread this out on the floor so he's free to roll around," Parker commanded. Like a dutiful husband, Jarod did as he was asked.

"There you go." She laid Burke down on the floor. "You can play while daddy gets your bag out of the car, sweetie."

When Parker stood up, Jarod pinned her against the wall in his quickest movement. His face was inches away from hers. She felt his hot breath on her face. His chestnut colored eyes stared into her sky blue ones. He kissed her hungrily. She kissed him back. His body crushed hers into the wall. Her tongue slipped into his mouth. Suddenly, she pushed him away and screamed.

"What in bloody hell are you doing?"

Jarod pushed her again, his body pressed hard against her. He trailed soft kisses which started from her ears, down to her neck, then to her lips. Her arms snaked around his back, under his shirt. When he finally pulled away, Parker gasped for air.

"Why'd you kiss me like that?" She asked, trying to catch her breath.

"I thought it would shut you up a bit."

"Well, get away from me." He nearly stumbled backwards when Parker shoved him.

"I'm sorry for everything, for letting you down, putting you down. And I know you wouldn't do anything to hurt the baby. Whatever you need, whatever you want, I'll give you, Parker. I won't stand in your way. And if it's me you don't want in your life, I'll just have to accept it."

Miss Parker glanced down at the baby, then moved her eyes to Jarod. She doesn't remember who initiated the next move. But, she felt her mouth on his. His lips engulfed hers as he pulled her tightly against him. Slipping his hand under her tee-shirt, he fumbled for her bra hook.

"It's in the front, the hook's in front," she whispered. "Wait, the baby."

"What about him?" He asked as he quickly unfastened her bra. "He's fine."

As they embraced, desire coursed through their blood. Parker felt the warmth of his hand as his fingers gently massaged her left breast. Her soft moans ended abruptly as Jarod stepped back away from her.

"What? Don't stop now," she begged and pulled his hand back onto her breast.

Panic crossed his face. "What the hell is this?" He asked. His fingers firmly pressed above her nipple. Quickly, she moved his hand away.

Pulling down her shirt, she walked away from him. "Nothing. It's nothing."

He caught hold of her arm and pulled her into the bedroom. "I felt something. Off with your tee shirt, Parker."

"Why? I'm fine! Just fine! It's nothing! I'm fine." She repeated and pulled on to her shirt tightly.

"What the hell? You know what I'm talking about!"

She stood in silence, then headed out of her bedroom door. "I'd better check on the baby."

"Get back in here!" His temperature rose to a point of explosion. "The baby's fine! But, you're not! How long? How long have you had that..this..." His voiced cracked.

"Lump, Jarod. It's called a lump." She turned to him and crossed her arms in front of her.

"How long?" He swallowed hard and waited for an answer.

Parker shrugged. "I don't remember. A month or two, maybe longer. I don't remember."

"I've never felt it before, Parker." She backed away as he took careful steps to her.

"Don't touch me." He did and held on to her tightly. "I've never noticed it before."

"It's because you're partial to my right side," she answered softly.

"How stupid can you be! Have you made an appointment yet?" Jarod released her and stood an arm's length away.

"No. I'm fine. Don't worry about it."

"Worry? Worry! I'm already worried about you!"

Jarod walked to the night stand and nearly yanked the telephone off. "Call now! You make an appointment now! What were you thinking? Or were you thinking at all? Burke's already lost one mother! He doesn't need to lose another! I don't want to lose you! Are you pregnant?"

"What? No! What are you talking about"?

"Then, what's your reason for not having it checked out? You think it would just go away on its own? I know the last few days seemed like I didn't want you in my life, in our lives, but..." He stopped to raise his arm to wipe his tears on the sleeve of his shirt. A rush of memories ran through his mind of their lives from the very beginning.

Tightly, Parker embraced him and whispered. "Okay, okay. I'll have it checked. I'm sorry. I should have done it earlier. I'm just so afraid what it might be. I've been thinking of Rachel a lot these last several weeks. And I don't think I'd be as strong as her, if..." She cried in his arms.

"What am I going to do without you?" His eyes watered freely. He then kissed her cheek and tasted her tears.

Parker kissed him lightly on his lips. Each time she held on to him tighter, he embraced her even more. "Okay, it's okay. I'm sorry for what I'm putting you through. Maybe you should have stayed away. I'm sorry."

He pulled her onto the bed and cradled her warmly against his chest. They both cried out for her pain. Her watery eyes stared up at him. "We'll get through this," he told her. But, yet, he hadn't believed a word he said.

Jarod was afraid that history had just repeated itself. He couldn't be without Parker for even a moment. He didn't want to lose her. He could never be strong enough to let her go or to ever tell her goodbye.

TBC - Chapter 9