Reviews For Balance
Title: Chapter 1

I tried to guess before reading the reviews but I only found 50% of the answer. I knew Jarod was the attacker because of the last sentence. After all who has more cause than Jarod to "balance the scales"? The cheap leather glove did make me wonder about Cox or Lyle but they wouldn't be caught dead wearing cheap stuff.

As for the person attacked, the tone first made me think of Broots, but the text was lacking in geeky references. :) Sydney or Miss Parker didn't fit the bill at all as I couldn't imagine them thinking something like "shut me up real fast". Besides I am convinced that they would never shut up just because of a gun... Sydney because talking is his profession and Miss Parker because talking is her way of keeping control and buying time... So I thought maybe it was Mr Lyle because he would know cheap from expensive leather, and there is a streak of vulgarity in him... no, not vulgarity, but the idea that beneath the sophisticated smooth appearance lurks someone much more brutal and much more raw, the thug in him who could say "you don't talk with the man with the gun". Also he would know about the power show (making the safety click...)

But I can also see Mr Parker in that position... Anyway, well done for keeping us, guessing, it's far from easy!

Reviewer: middleman Signed starstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 07/10/08 02:23 pm
Title: Chapter 1

good start, go on asap.

Reviewer: doty Anonymous starstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 12/04/08 03:39 pm
Title: Chapter 1

Awsome oneshot. Especially love the last sentence.

Would be very interesting to see you turn this into a longer piece, especially after you revealed the "who/what"-part.

 

Reviewer: Manoline Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 08/12/07 01:43 pm
Title: Chapter 1

I'd love to drop by the forum and chat, I mean discuss this  but life is hectic right now and I'm doing good sneaking in the few stories I've been able to tonight.  I'll have to wait until you break down and tell us. 

 So if it isn't Broots, then Syd?  I can't picture it being Syd!  And if cheap isn't a key then why the heck did you use it???? Aha!  I know, just for meaniness, just to tease us!  I knew it!  You are really one of Raines' minions in disguise!  You're here to use us for sims, making us run thru mental mazes filled with deceptive clues and to torture us with abstract ideas that only a genuis could figure out!  ACK!  Some one save me!!!!!!



Author's Response:

(laughs softly).  You can relax, RaChell.  TLM guessed correctly on the forum about (checks watch) 15 minutes ago, so the gig is up for me (it was fun while it lasted).  So here we go:

The gunman is Jarod.  His hapless victim is Mr. Parker.  This is my interpretation of Donoterase 2 where he kidnaps the all-powaful chairman to use as a hostage to get Major Charles back.  I used the word "cheap" to subtly rule out the most obvious candidate for the dastardly deed:  the Armani-wearing, leather-glove-clad Mr. Lyle.  Considering Jarod walks around with 2 dollar plastic candy dispensers sticking out of his pocket, I don't see him being fussy about his leather gloves.  This is also a hint about the "victim;" very few people are rich and snobby enough to recognize the quality of their attacker's gloves while they're being kidnapped.

Just for fun, I threw in a little Jarod-style justice:  he reenacts his own kidnapping to punish Mr. P.

Please don't freak out.  I like my subjects (cough, cough) friends to be calm and content when they're reading my experiments stories. :)

Thanks, RaChell!

P.S.  I could have been much more cruel; after 9 months and 8 chapters, KatieQ still has not revealed the answer to her "Guess who, guess what."

Reviewer: RaChell Signed [Report This]
Date: 07/12/07 11:16 pm
Title: Chapter 1

Right, a girl has to have some secrets!  (cough, cough) Don't think it's Jarod because of the cheap gloves  but then again it could be.  He might be shopping at Walmart these days due to the writers' strike. (wink, wink)  Don't think it's Cox, he would go naked, ah ...I mean bare handed rather then wear cheap gloves!

 Ok the person threaten might be Broots, gotta love the show of bravo.  OK I give, I'm stumped!  Oh yes, I suppose you think you deserve a 10.  (wink, wink!)



Author's Response:

:)  Verrry good analysis.  Off track, but you get an A for effort!

While I appreciate the logical process, I think you're reading too much into that one word "cheap."  The narrator is not Broots, but you're on the right track.  Sorta.

I'm toying discussing this with the people on the forum, if anyone wants to drop by and see what others are saying.  It's in the SIM under "Writing Games."

Reviewer: RaChell Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 07/12/07 09:24 pm
Title: Chapter 1

Oh, thats a tough one!!! Hmmm......I think it is Mr. Lyle possibly killing......Mr. Raines???? No. Its Mr. Lyle killing someone. I think it could also be Mr. Lyle killing Miss Parker.  You are going to let us in on who it was, aren't you? Pretty please?

Author's Response:

Very good guesses, but off track.  Leather glove guy is not Mr. Lyle.  He wouldn't be caught dead wearing a cheap leather glove.

If nobody guesses, I'll spill the beans eventually, but not just yet.  A girl's gotta have some secrets:)

Reviewer: anamcharalove Anonymous [Report This]
Date: 07/12/07 08:54 am


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