Really like what you're doing here. Very good story teller.
Reviewer: Barb Anonymous [Report This]Date: 27/08/18 07:28 pm
Well, I'm hooked.
I really like this story so far. You are really good at portraying what is likely for people to say, think, feel and do in pressured situations, while staying completely in character.
And I loved how you explained the reason Jarod "moved", so to say, and how both he and Sydney reacted to that.
*bows at your pwness*
Author's Response: Nice to hear from you as always =). Thanks for the feedback on the characterization, it is the one thing I really do try to keep accurate. I'm also glad you liked the flashback, there will be more to come. Reviewer: Manoline Signed
[Report This]Date: 27/01/07 03:34 am
Nice going! Loved the line"...stir up her emotions like a blended fruit smoothie." Like that very much.
Good start but I'm not ready to call off the Centre sweepers yet! ;) Anything that will prod you to move along a little faster is worth it.
Author's Response: hahaha.. well Chapters 2-5 are in the hands of the beta.. you know where to send Willie. Thanks again for the review, it's always extremely appreciated. Happy waiting =)
Date: 26/01/07 05:04 pm
I am almost scared to read any further. I really like how you have dealt with Parker's turning point. Far too often it is too rushed and completely implausabe, but this was very well done.
And i like the insight into the 'battle for Jarod'. He would never be broken through brute force alone. I hope he hangs on to the bitter end.
Author's Response:
Thanks for the comments about Parker. I tried really hard not to make her 'cave' to easily.. and she still hasn't really. Will try to get the next one out ASAP! Thanks for reading :D
Reviewer: jaccione Signed [Report This]Date: 26/01/07 12:08 am
you have got to keep going. this is an excellent story and i need more.
Author's Response:
don't worry, me and this story are fully dedicated to each other. It's a story that's been brewing in my mind in years, I mean i wrote conflict zero just to be able to write this story! hehehe. I promise you'll be getting a lot more of it soon. Chapters 2-4 are out at the beta's and 5's just about there. Thanks for the feedback, I really appreciate it!
Reviewer: mpj Anonymous [Report This]Date: 25/01/07 09:07 pm
