You've got an original starting point here. And quite a startling one as well!! 

However, I think your story would benefit from being fleshed out a little bit. Help us see what is in your mind, What is the context, what state of mind were broots and sydney in on their way to miss Parker's house? Who was driving, was it at breakneck speed? What about your fireman, what does he look like, is he tall? Does he look tired? Has he obviously been working on site for awhile, is there soot on his uniform? Is the area around the house cordonned off?

It's gonna be interesting to see where you take this story next...