Reviews For Darkness Falling
Title: Chapter 16

When the worlds all collide. It was an amazing collision. Brandts thoughts about Parker were what I imagine everyone's is when they meet her. Brandt is right. Jarod will shoulder his way in. He does that all the time.

Reviewer: James Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 22/04/20 01:24 am
Title: Chapter 15

Jarod's internal dialogue. I'm going back feeling like shit. lol. You give the right amount of detail without losing sight of the story itself. Yes Jarod is lying. He will never leave alone. Comedy gold within the tragedy.

Reviewer: James Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 22/04/20 01:00 am
Title: Chapter 14

Running from himself. Yes. We do that sometimes. Where do you get these ideas? Brandt is a good man. You create these gentle and intelligent characters and you know exactly where to place them and exactly how to move all of the characters. Awe-inspiring.

Reviewer: James Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 22/04/20 12:43 am
Title: Chapter 13

Beautiful. Your descriptive work is beautiful, the travel, all of it. You move them so well and transition between scenes flawlessly.

A miscarriage fits the timeline and is so plausible that I'm... I can't even think now Mirage.

Reviewer: James Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 22/04/20 12:29 am
Title: Chapter 12

The Jarod-Ethan tension is incredibly intense. I like the power play by Parker no matter what her intentions were. Parker propositioning Jarod for sex was something I would have never expected from you. I can see her doing it but I can't see you writing that because you never seemed to like Jarod.

I've read thousands of stories but I've never seen the characters so in character as they are when you write them. Sydney... you did right by him too. Bravo!

Reviewer: James Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 22/04/20 12:11 am
Title: Chapter 11

You bring these characters to life Mirage. I should have known it was Ethan too but like Jarod was in the dark. You write the different relationship dynamics beautifully. And that final line. I feel so much sympathy for Jarod.

Reviewer: James Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 21/04/20 11:56 pm
Title: Chapter 10

Magnificent!

You insert so much realism in for example the dried blood where Parker failed to start a line which is realistic. We wouldn't expect her nursing skills to be perfect when she's not a nurse and we've seen Jarod instructing her in the past with Fenigore at the bank. Your writing blows me away. Bravo.

Reviewer: James Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 21/04/20 11:47 pm
Title: Chapter 9

Heraclitus. I thought that was something dirty for a sec. I don't know who that is. All of the philosphy was time stealing from me. I need to revisit. Do you think a long time before you come up with an idea? How does it work? You interest me. I'm intrigued.

Reviewer: James Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 21/04/20 11:34 pm
Title: Chapter 8

Awesome. That last line. Punch in the face exit. All pretender.

Reviewer: James Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 21/04/20 11:15 pm
Title: Chapter 7

Unraveled. Rachel is unraveling. You transition exceptionally... out of this world and you tie everything together. It's a tight story.

Reviewer: James Signed [Report This]
Date: 21/04/20 11:07 pm
Title: Chapter 6

In a thousand languages. I was in physical pain when she snapped that pencil. Hey, I'm a guy.

Reviewer: James Signed [Report This]
Date: 21/04/20 10:45 pm
Title: Chapter 5

Jarod, Jarod. He is a ladie's man. Seeing his own face and knowing he's the one that fixed the video so it would play. All around top notch chapter.

Reviewer: James Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 21/04/20 10:29 pm
Title: Chapter 4

New word for me. Yclept. I like. You used it correctly too! Mirage fiction is educational and entertaining.

Reviewer: James Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 21/04/20 10:19 pm
Title: Chapter 3

Ok. Question. Are you Zina? From what little I know about you you strike me as a bookworm entreprenuer author with a wild party streak. I don't think of you as a gum chewer. I think you'd probably make eye contact with people though because that's not something someone would admit and point out. I can see you chatting with Jarod or Michael and the actors. You don't seem shy. I read this and something strikes me. I don't know what. You don't seem to like Jarod all that much. I'm curious that's all. I like Zina. Something about her.

Rachel here is fabulous. You write these characters as they are. I marvel.

Reviewer: James Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 21/04/20 10:08 pm
Title: Chapter 2

I love Miss P's punch in the face entrance into this second chapter. She's on fire. You mention the changes in Carthis and win bonus plausibility points. I like to escape reality too and read but unless it's clearly alternate universe material I want things to be plausible within what we already know from the television series. I love the technical parts, the upgrades the Centre always needed. They have geniuses working for them and should have always been that technologically advanced. Have I mentioned your brilliance recently?

Reviewer: James Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 21/04/20 09:58 pm
Title: Chapter 1

Settling in for a nice long read. The first chapter grabs me and pulls me in. I'm captivated by each turn of the phrase. I love how it feels like a detective crime thriller and this is the before the scenes of where Jarod and MP come in to play. You're brilliant. I already like Brandt and feel so much for young McGraff who I can see clearly a young boy in man's body. You illustrate with words.

Reviewer: James Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 21/04/20 09:53 pm
Title: Chapter 24

 

 

Jarod's all like yes i"m going to do this with the scalepl all ready to go. I'm so freaked out about this. Thanks for the warning too.

 

 

Please update.

Reviewer: d_el1 Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 30/10/19 01:01 am
Title: Chapter 23

Awww. There are soo good together if she's with Jarod. Is she? I need to know. That HAS to be Jarod with her. He's so nice and tender and sweet just like Michael. OMG. Please!

Reviewer: d_el1 Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 30/10/19 12:22 am
Title: Chapter 22

lol. "No. Are you crazy?" GOLD. Miss Parker Classic Gold.

Please don't me that Parker had sex with Jarod's evil clone. oh gods. ugh.

Reviewer: d_el1 Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 30/10/19 12:01 am
Title: Chapter 21

YES!

You are the best smut writer, sex writer, romance writer, action writer, drama writer. I can't EVEN think after that. My favorite part was Jarod's thoughts about Parker's ""litle death."'"  Just so wow. Mind=blown. Boom!

 

Reviewer: d_el1 Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 29/10/19 11:47 pm
Title: Chapter 20

This is a chilling chapter that ... the things you explore, the darker parts of the Centre that we know exist because Ethan was created by a coerced insemination and pregnancy... coerced because Catherine was sedated. If she didn't agree to it or couldn't it was coercion.Still, we know it exists but don't want to see the in between or the collateral damage of it but you always go there and make us look and I think that's probably necessary even if it is scary and really dark. You really aren't afraid of the dark.

"Parker was en route to sublevel eleven. Jarod would have been too, had he been thinking clearly; he would have walked directly to the file room and explored the Requisitions and Expenditures files. Within minutes he would have deduced that pharmaceutical grade freezers and cryogenic tanks were delivered two years earlier. Armed with the date and time of delivery a brief stroll to the Surveillance Storage (just down the corridor from the Tech room) on sublevel five would have provided a vivid picture of the destination of aforementioned appliances: sublevel thirteen, corridor eight, a room with no name.

But Jarod was not only furious, he was agonizing over the question of whether or not he wouldor coulddestroy viable embryos. And if not then what?

In Wing G, he arrived much too late to prevent Parker from answering the questions that plagued his mind. She'd done everything short of dousing the room with gasoline and dropping a lit match. He processed the destruction with lips parted in shock.

Cryopreservation tanks had been unlidded and overturned. Every vialall one hundred twenty of themlay shattered on the floor. Forty or so cryocanes strewn across the room mingled with ruptured embryo straws, identification rods, stylettes, catheters, syringes and all of the usual stainless steel tools of the obstetrics and gynecology practice.

A crippled halogen examination lamp lay on its side, its absent casters no doubt liberated by the force of being thrust into a triptych of transparent OLED screens.

Parker had smashed state of the art microscopes, three embryo freezers, transabdominal and transvaginal ultrasounds as well as computers that monitored liquid nitrogen levels, and had raised the room temperature to stifling degrees.

Jarod shuddered, nonetheless.

Rage.

Unadulterated rage."

It made this scene that follows so much sweeter and sexier.Cherry on top of it all Mirage. Thank you. This is THE BEST romance I've ever read.

"She leaned into his touch, closed her eyes, murmured mutely when he kissed her chin, cheek, forehead, the corner of her mouth. Leisurely, he cradled her face in his hands, caressed her lips with his, parting them.

Her mouth tasted faintly of spearmint, no doubt chosen to conceal the quart of scotch she'd drank the prior evening and still appreciable enough to camouflage the lemonade he'd sipped at lunch. Jarod intended to taste her again, mint free- those were his final thoughts prior to forgetting to think.

Parker clasped his face with eager hands, kissed him deeply, danced him against a bare wall. She gasped into his mouth when his hands closed around her waist. Without any further ceremony, Jarod hoisted Parker off her feet. Her legsand the rest of herinstinctively wrapped around him.

They were both in various stages of undress when, breathlessly, they drew back in astonishment from each other. Parker twisted herself out of his grasp, unwound her limbs from his body. The wall, fortunately, intercepted Jarod's collapse.

The pair straightened, slowed their respirations, and seemed to mutely agree that they were finished with each other- or that at least, for their own safety, should be.

"Dinner," he reminded, unbuttoning and turning up his shirtsleeves. "Seven thirty?"

"All right," she agreed with a curt nod. And then shook her head. "No," she said.

Jarod stiffened, frowned. "No?"

"No," repeated Parker firmly. With some urgency, she added, "Let's leave now."

Reviewer: d_el1 Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 29/10/19 11:20 pm
Title: Chapter 19

lol your notes again hilarious. "rope placement screams Jarod in  every language." You're not wrong Mirage. I thought that too. Jarod tightened the rope right over her breast. OUCH. I wanted to know what happened during commerical break and now I know. Thank you for that.

Clement's story was so touching. I love that you give other Centre victims a voice too here and imply there are many more with stories too. Lots of exploration could have continued. You're a genius to think of it. I wish you were writing the pretender novels. I really do and It's a shame you aren't.

"I'm not going to hurt her," Jarod assured Parker, his anger tempered with compassion. "You should already know that. I'm going to give her a rather low dose of Diazepam to calm her," he explained didactically. "This will relax her, not sedate her. Once she's calmer, I will restrain her- if it's necessary- and assess her injuries and mental status and treat her. It's imperative also that I fingerprint her and take her photograph if she's unable to communicate. I'd like to return her to her family as soon as possible. Don't you want that for her?"

Parker regarded him blankly and adamantly refused to yield.

"You do realize that I could cuff you to an empty cell, don't you," he challenged and observed her stiffen. He believed she'd step aside then and actively participate in defusing the conflict. He was mistaken. "You and I are both rational adults," added Jarod. "I don't think either of us wants this to escalate."

Escalate? He's threatening me?

"I," declared Jarod gravely, "don't want to physically remove you from the premises."

Odd. He hadn't been too troubled when he'd locked her inside a shipping container with her brother or when he had her arrested in deliverance country.

Nor had he been all that dismayed in Florida when he'd dropped to a crouch beside her and gently albeit forcibly bound her wrists, entirely ignoring her objections. In the course of the struggle, she'd almost freed her shoulder from the leather jacket in his determined grasp and escaped him. She'd underestimated his strength and his ability to anticipate uppercuts and groin kicks. Jarod had effortlessly dodged her blows and fingernails and had all too easily succeeded in securing her to a support beam. Humiliating. 

She would not underestimate him again. She didn't have to. Her 9mm was an adequate equalizer. 

"I don't want to pull my gun on you, Jarod. You'll leave me no other option if you take one more step."

"If I take one more step, Miss Parker, you won't have an opportunity to draw your weapon."

His words wrenched her fully into the present moment. He was correct, realized Parker with a start. She'd made this mistake before and had found herself staring into the business end of her own gun.

He was close enough again, damn it to disarm her.

"You shouldn't have come back here," he asserted, his face darkening in anger. "As a matter of fact, you should have never been allowed access to this wing in the first place."

"It would've taken a helluva lot more than an order from you to stop me," she countered.

"I'm surprised that your bullheadedness hasn't gotten you killed."

"Surprises all around," rebutted Parker tartly. "I imagine being a prick has its disadvantages, too; I've been tempted, at times, to kill you myself."

Miss Parker calling Jarod a prick is a scene that should have happened on the show. They need to have sex. There is so much tension. I can see the muscles on their faces... your work here is perfect. In the missing scene you provide us she struggled to not be restrained by Jarod and fought him and still lost. That's hard for me because she's so strong but we saw Keys and she was tied up and that means Jarod got the upper hand on her. She's not that tough. Sometimes these things are staring me in the face and I'm like wanting to argue anyway though and tell you that no , Jarod could never be in control of her, he could never do any of that stuff in FON or Circles of Hell but he can and he has and he did on the tv screen he definitely tied her up. I concede it all to you Mirage. Jarod is a genius and he can be anything and he can do anything. Your brutal reminder of her tied up in the Keys was all I needed. 

Reviewer: d_el1 Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 29/10/19 11:14 pm
Title: Chapter 18

"You can't be here," Parker informed him when the door closed.

"I can't be here? Hmm, now that's both odd and strangely ironic. You've spent the better part of your life trying to bring me back here and now that I am here you're telling me I can't be. Or are you implying I can't be here of my own volition? Is that it?"

Oooh. Jarod when we gets aggressive is a force that even Parker can't reckon with. He's just... sexy as hell too and being in control like that.. hmmmmm .OMG. I can't EVEN.

"Yes," affirmed Jarod. "The people to whom you gave your loyalties fled and left you indefensible. They didn't care about you or the people they've held prisoner and used for their own sordid purposes. You, Sydney—you're unwitting scapegoats. Fortunately, this was predictable. Fortunately," reiterated Jarod hotly, "the man you spent your adult life pursuing and distrusting prepared for every contingency. A Centre jet carrying Cox and board members was escorted to a private airstrip by two F-16s. Charges are pending."

"Can't say I wasn't warned," confessed Parker gracefully, averting her gaze.

"No," agreed Jarod coolly, sitting rigidly on the squat black leather sofa. "No, you can't. All of this," he said with a sweeping wave of hand, indicating her office, "will be gone in two weeks. This property and all subsidiaries of the Centre and Triumvirate are presently being seized."

"Seized? Brandt didn't say anything-"

"I asked him not to. I thought it might be a dealbreaker and I didn't want you to renege."

"You've been involved all this time," she murmured, unfolding her arms, dropping them at her sides.

"I have," confirmed Jarod with a frown. "It's still your office until the week's end, however," he soothed with an amiable smile. "You can sit if you'd like."

Just.... omg.

Reviewer: d_el1 Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 29/10/19 11:06 pm
Title: Chapter 17

"Life goes on" Oh yeah life goes on... long after the trill of living is gone. That's a Mellencamp tune for the 80's anyway. It's also a Beatles tune.

I so totatlly agree with Jarod about how people laugh and carry on crazily when someone dies. That's not grief. Oh, so curious about what happens next. Glad I don't have to wait... teheheee

Reviewer: d_el1 Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 29/10/19 11:01 pm
Title: Chapter 16

OMG I love Broots reaction to Parker helping Jarod. Finally she admits it.

 

"Relax? Sydney," he hissed, "I falsified documentation and surveillance."
 
Parker lowered her wine glass abruptly and said in a tight, low whisper, "That's the last time you say those words aloud."
 
"Jarod and his family are grieving, Broots," explained Sydney softly.
 
"Yeah, and it's one thing for you and Miss Parker to pick up the tab for his mother's funeral arrangements but another thing altogether to lie to Cox's face or-or to create lairs, jobs, and newspaper articles. Orchestrating a diversion of this magnitude is- it's not feasible. And you're exhausted, Miss Parker. Admit it."
 
"We're buying him some time," Parker said succinctly.
 
"It's been three months," exclaimed Broots. "Between this and trying to track down the psycho serial killer Jarod clone—because hey, you know, one clone wasn't enough for the Centre—I'm losing it."

 

Etta and Merle. Noice. Nice nice. I love their music. I love that the police and feds have cool ringtones. I'm addicted to your writing Mirage.

Reviewer: d_el1 Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 29/10/19 10:52 pm


Enter the security code shown below:
Note: You may submit either a rating or a review or both.