I liked how you wrote Miss Parker - very in character - and the way you portrayed her from a first POV. You captured very nicely the duality of who she is and who is presently dominant in her personality.
Loved Jarod saying hello from the camera. Was she right, was he waitin gto say it? Or did he sim her and simply know?
But, the mystery that weights heavier than all others, as I'm sure was intended, was how they ended up there, in the beginning of the chapter, away from the Center and dead. Or are they really?
I'm very interesting in reading more! :D
Reviewer: bloodymary2 Signed
[Report This]Date: 09/06/10 06:18 pm
Very powerful start. keep it up!
Reviewer: Anna Anonymous [Report This]Date: 29/05/10 01:44 pm
Hi just read your story it's good looking forward to the next chapter.
Reviewer: Katescats Anonymous [Report This]Date: 27/05/10 10:58 pm
uhhhh....very intriguing! Guess this approach hasn't been taken so far. Loved the way how you described her change and filled the 15year-gap. Seems to make a lotta sense and doesn't feel weird at allto see how she behaves and all. As always a superb description of MissParker (outward appearance plus character)!
Since it's her arrival at the Centre and 1year later she (apparently)ends up dead I'm curious about to where this story might lead. Reads kinda thriller-crime-scene like. Lovin' it!
Top-notch work as always Miss_Shanon! Can't wait to read more.
Reviewer: IceAngel Signed [Report This]Date: 26/05/10 06:50 pm
WoW! that was quite intersting and I'm dying for a continue.
Reviewer: Ivyleaf Anonymous
[Report This]Date: 26/05/10 08:23 am
